So I haven't been blogging lately cause my camera suddenly gained 903094890585 kg and it's the weight equivalent to an obese kid.

Starting this post off with a I AM SRS BZNESS face HAHAHAHA. I've been sticking to my New Year Resolutions lately (Minus the whole stop-eating-junk-food and be a less bitchy person ones) and BAM. Holla to my new found love for grey!!

Leather Lapel Jacket - All Saints.

Grandaddy Sweater - Topman.

Skinny Shorts (IDK either) - LE7.

Thrifted Boots - Salvation Army.

Friend : Eh I thought you wanna wear more colours?

Bryan : Grey lor.

Friend : Why not red, blue. /proceeds to list all the colours of the ~*~rainbow~*~

Bryan : When Tin Pei Ling gains a brain, then I wear.

Friend + Me : TROLOLOLOLOLOL.

Happy happy day~ Deceiving ya'll that I don't have homicidal thoughts of kicking people in the genitals on public transport, breaking the necks of kids who cry obnoxiously loud in restaurants or sacrificing stupid people to Satan! :3

Met up with my favourite bitch (I'm a whore so I have a few LOL) to harass another favourite bitch at NOISE Singapore where we spent the night rolling on the floor, talking bout school politics and creating a giant mess all to create a tote bag decoration.

Can't believe 3 years has passed ; Felt like yesterday that I quarrelled with her during a class presentation HAHAHAHA THOSE WERE GOOD TIMES.

Oh you know, just art students doing their thing. And I'm ADDICTED to wearing my turban!! It's almost worst than Chris Brown's addiction to physical abuse, Kim Kardashian's addiction to wearing Spanx or Nicki Minaj's addiction to wearing fugly wigs. Maybe all three combined! D:

Nicknames I've received so far are - Turban Kia , Turban Boy, Indian-Wannabe, Sikh Supreme.

Felt like primary school arts class all over again. Minus the heavy amount of testosterone (Was from a boy's school HAHAHAHA BELIEVE IT OR NOW) , psycho art teacher who REFUSED to let me go to the toilet until I threatened to piss my pants (Was a horrible kid, no lie) and giant chio school. ):

I think it's kinda ironic how we studied arts and media for 3 years and this was the best we could do. I firmly believe that there's a future out there in Japanese Cartoon Drawing out there for me!!!

Made a new one with overlapping graphics to represent society ; A mass but dysfunctional ocean of souls with overlapping social stereotypes and characters.

Ok la we just spammed chops on it cause we got bored and lazy.

ME GUSTA.

A surge of testosterone or just simply succumbing to age.

I have NO IDEA WHY but I've recently started to favour a simpler aesthetic when it comes to dressing. Probably long gone are the days where I accessorize like crazy and resemble something that of a punky black gangster from dA h00D yAwZ or go all OTT in my outfits because now, I'm leaning in to a more mature style whilst still aiming to look chic.

But of course, I'll still stick to my black drapey shit (That's what my Dad calls my clothes HAHAHA) cause it's the crux of my looks!!!

Attributing this sudden change to a surge of testoterone (HAHAHAHA increased sperm count or something like that idk) or simply succumbing to the fact that I'm hitting the big...2 this year?

As demonstrated by Emmanuelle Alt ; New Editor-in-Chief of Vogue Paris, you don't need to go all over-the-top-ghetto-fabulous to look fucking awesome. I believe it was a picture on the right of her that made me go CRAZY over the leather jacket + white shirt combo.

The whole "Oh I woke up late and wanna be comfortable but still look like I can kick ass" look. But then again models can pull off that look and I'd strive to be this skinny if it weren't for the fact that... I love my carbs and meat too much sigh. #totesanasian

Gasp you mean you can still look awesome in... wait for it.... BAGGY PANTS?!?! It's like saying Rihanna can sing live or that Nicki Minaj isn't an insane ho!!!

Another easy way to #cheatafashionlook ; Giant swallow-you-up-the-right-way fur coat, skinny pants and a pair of fucking kick ass shoes. Aiming to score myself one in Hongkong!!! Flying on the 2nd AWWWWYEAH STARSHIPS~ WERE MEANT TO FLY~ /gyrates around pole in a sexually repulsive manner.

HOW DO THESE SKINNY BITCHES DO IT TELL ME RIGHT NOW!1!!!111!!!!!1

I really think that there's a HUGE SURGE of testosterone flowing through my bloodstream (Pretty soon I'll be watching 6-Pack Shortcuts on Youtube or something to gain... ... ... ABS OF STEEL or simply, dressing like a hipster dude LOL) because I've been OBSESSING over a 2-piece suit of the same print. Houndstooth... Check! Checkers... Check! Geometric Stripes... Check!

Flower Prints... Maybe in another lifetime or the 9404904940th one!

My friend seems to think I'm insane cause I insist that this could be a dude. "Can what, who said guys can't have chio fingers? Yours look like chipolatas bitch!!!" Cue her ignoring me for 5 minutes until I spam cute dog videos to her.

A stream-lined look for days where I'm rushing to return clothes to showrooms or running for a shoot!!! Or simply running to the office cause I'm late for work. Starting work at Catalog Magazine on the 6th!!! Totes excited!!! The editor-in-chief is SO COOL IT'S AMAZING. What I would give to rock a severely-shaved crop!!!

Okay lah, must post a picture of things I'll NEVER be able to give up. Heavy textures, over-the-top layering and black clunky shoes that are perfect for kicking a molester/annoying china man or bitchy classmate in the crotch!!!

WANT SOME FUR SO BADLY!!!

Pictures are from http://what-do-i-wear.tumblr.com/ where I spend countless hours on every day and cry into my dog's fur cause I'll never be able to afford awesome couture. And I'm meeting mah homegurl later to bum in town SO YAY PHOTOS!!! Will finally be able to make a post without shamelessly-taken photos from other people's blogs!!! :D

Oh you know, just a blog post bout someone I'm obsessed but it's totally normal to do such stuff right?

So I think everybody knows my INSANE obsession with androgynous people by now considering how most of the time, I’m like OH MY GOD SO DID I TELL YOU BOUT THIS CHICK WHO LOOKS LIKE SHE HAS A DICK…BUT SHE’S REALLY HOT NOT LYING STOP GIVING DAT FACE!!! Or “So this model looks like a girl but he has a penis. Why can’t I look that good?” Sense of propriety, I severely lack.

Style Idol of the day aka. a person whose wardrobe I will sell my first born child for ; Kate Lanphear!!! If you don’t know who you are, feel free to youtube her and writhe in aural orgasm at her voice. HAHAHA IF THAT DOESN’T SOUND CREEPY THEN I DUNNO WHAT DOES.

Looking androgynous AS HELL!!! One of the reasons I’m embracing suits lately but then again I’m a dude. Been looking for the PERFECT tweed coat + houndstooth pants. T_T

Dayyuuuuuum gurrrrrrl dat leather jacket’s perfect. I think it’s a fashion-person kinda pose. Awesome hair, talking on the phone to discuss a million-dollar photoshoot with a famous photographer & model, awesome clothes and a look of seriousness. TAKE NOTE.

No words; Just a longing for a new faux-fur coat. Something you can even wear in your room whilst blasting the air-con at 16degrees on a cold rainy night and crying your eyes out whilst watching Anastacia or a Disney movie. Just throw in some hot milo and a box of tissue paper (For crying and not other dubious activities) and you’re good to go.

I AM FIERCE AND SERIOUS pose. One of the reasons why I tell people it’s not too hard to have an entire wardrobe filled with black as long as you know how to layer textures. Jersey, Chiffon and Denim together actually looks amazing and all you need is let's say a Chiffon Top / Jersey Scarf worn as a cape and a pair of Denim Jeans. Throw on a leather jacket and you're already effectively layering.

Even on an off-style day, she still looks fucking amazing. Of course you would be if you’re all OHEY SHALL DRESS DOWN BUT WILL STILL WEAR MY HERMES COLLIER DE CHAIN CUFF. :3 Not a big fan of the red toe nails but s'ok s'ok homegurl has awesome shoes. I always get SO ANNOYED whenever I see people with cray cray ugly shoes.

Finally, a picture which is placed under my “Inspiration” file because errone loves themselves like #totesawesome arm candy especially in the form of leather, spiked and bondage-y ones. Can’t wait for 3 pieces from Taobao to come that I ordered!!! Y U NO COME NOW.

Let the only sound be the overflow.

Whilst I’m typing this blog entry out in Microsoft Word, I’m actually sitting in the exam room for my very first round of exams. I’d like to think that I’m FUCKING FEARLESS LIKE THAT TROLOLOL. Actually, make it GANGSTA LIKE THAT!!!

After months of seeing her angst on Twitter over her work, Phaik and I decided it’s high time we decided to ask Diana out for some high tea (latest addiction sob), And of course, nothing screams LUXE and WE’RE MAKING YOU PAY FOR OVERPRICED TEA like chiotastic flower arrangements.

TWG @ MBS totes wins in ambience. The one at Ion is SUPER stuffy but then again it has hotter waiters/waitresses. Superficiality over Comfort. Applies to my dress sense too.

See interesting stuff > Whip out camera > Instagram it > #leSingaporeanway

Ehmargawrrrrrd gaizzzzz we’re so atassssssssssss.

Phaik has this whole Korean-eye-smile thing. Choosing to sound neutral even though I’m jealous as fuck HAHAHAHA Y I NO CHIO. Bet she’s smirking as she reads this I WUV YOUUUUUU.

Look as Diana caresses it, her fingertips grazing the shiny metal whilst she writhes in hedonistic pleasure at the cool smoothness.

My muffins (LOL) which is drenched in what looks suspiciously like coke but is actually icing sugar. Totes yummers!!! :3

Everybody, let’s act atas even though we swear like sailors and would not mind squatting by the roadside to eat pasar malam food!!! I actually did it once with my chinese orchestra friends and we nearly got ran over by a garbage truck. Those were fun times. :’D

Wore a turban NOT BECAUSE I WAS HAVING A BAD HAIR DAY, but it’s because of Anna Dello Russo’s influence. Homegirl is my new idol next to Emmanuel Alt. I’D KILL FOR A GIVENCHY SHRINE TOO minus the panther hat cause I doubt I can work it. Typing this makes me feel so poor. :’D

Diana looking #classyasfuck as the two women at the back give the BITCH YOU SRS and OH NO YOU DIDN’T FACE LOL KEEP IT CLASSY LADIES!!!

Artsy Fartsy shot of me pouring tea. Insert some witty caption here bout the fineness of life and the luxuries of living.

Phaik’s INTENSELY blinged out phone. It’s heavy enough to concuss someone and if the person is still conscious enough to fight back, it’s sharp enough to cause SERIOUS DAMAGE to their face or certain body parts. Who needs pepper spray when you have a blinged out phone?! :3

Having girl talk ; Aka relationship talk. Lmao look at Diana’s #psychiatricface HAHAHAHA SUPER SRS.

Forever alone me decided that taking pseudo-artsy shots of the architecture would be a better way to while my time away.

“Eh I know you’re talking bout r/s stuff, but act chio leh. Good photo opportunity.”

“Diana, you’re not spared. Take also!!!.”

“Take a picture of me talking whilst I check my emails so I look REALLY important.”

OHMYGOD SHE DID NOT JUST SAY THAT SRSLYYYYYYYY.

I think I said something really gross and inappropriate which cues Phaik giving me the O_o? face. There’s a lot of BITCH-PLZ going on in this blogpost. Not sure what to feel.

Insert obligatory group shot of us. Purposely made the waiter shoot us at this angle so that Ralph Lauren is visible TROLOLOLOL. His latest collection looks like a Mcqueen ripoff with the headgear and what not but dude is still highly relevant. :3

Turban of Awesomeness - DIY

Chiffon Sleeveless Top - The HandleBar

Vests - Cotton On and SomethingNoir

Anouck Boots - Alexander Wang

Massive Satchel Bag - Bata

To commemorate Fashion Week (regardless of country…I LOVE THEM ALLLLLL. Can’t wait for AFF and MFW!!!) and to pretend I’m a fashion editor (Sob, my dream by the time I’m 30), I decided to go all out and be pimptastic. Shout out to my homegirl Jackie (Beyondjackie.blogspot.com) for the chiffon top! Totes light and comfy ohmygod brb wearing it and caressing my upper body.

Happy 4 years babe!! Even though you used to scare me to DEATH before on the Cosplay forum. (That’s another story for another time). Her username was…./drumroll…SM_QUEEN HAHAHAHA.

/Cue insane derping for the next few photos. If you’re having a big meal, showing this to your partner before you two have sexy time or generally have a sense of shame, please view something else like cute cat videos on youtube or how to swallow cinnamon powder without choking.

We bring the boys out like the 9 plastic-faces (MAJOR hate for SNSD!!! 2NE1 ftw bitchez!!!) who appeared on David Letterman FOR GOD KNOWS WHAT REASON. Thank you Ellen for keeping it cool even though I’m waiting for Ellie Goulding to appear!!!

Derping in front of a MASSIVE CROWD cause we can HAHAHAHAHA. My friends and I have a total lack of shame and propriety HEARTS FOR YOU ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL.

WHO DIS SEXY BITCH BE?! Apparently her skirt and top (Which has a sexy cut-out back for sexy times) only cost her $20 from Korea. Here I was thinking it was from Zara omg feeling so cheated!!!

LOOK AT DAT WALK.

Camwhoring like 14 years olds because we’re so afraid of growing old. Growing old means more responsibilities LIKE FINDING A HOUSE TO LIVE IN 8IWKJFXIGHJSKHFJKESHRSJEHKJ and other superficial stuff like whether we can have our own walk-in-wardrobe sigh.

They see me rollin~They hatin~.

Midway through camwhoring and looking at tourists jog across the bay (I wanna be so rich…that I can jog around MBS/Orchard Road for exercise. #quoteoftheday), the fountains started spurting water SO FUCKYEAH MORE DERPING. I think the key words are Erupt / Spurt and Squirt. ~*~flowery vocabulary we have~*~.

WE’RE SO SINGAPOREAN YHEY.

Le sexy time with Phaik. After 5 years of friendship you’d think we’d get SOMEWHERE LOL.

Taking a whiff of my A&F-ish scent (It’s Givenchy bitches!!!). Has anybody actually bought anything at A&F? Hit me up if you’ve actually bought a $269 fleece sweater with moose print on them. I’ll cook an English breakfast for you and if I’m feeling generous, throw you a back+foot rub.

Came out of the closet. Actually, a Narnia wardrobe.

And so did Phaik. Great friends do great things together. When we’re not pigging out on vodka ice cream floats and barbequed meat, we indulge in the awesomeness that is being public nuisances.

Oh and check out Diana’s photography work ; woddee.deviantart.com. Home girl does AMAZING WORK. <3